Sorry You Are Upset

So, it looks like my last post caused a lot of consternation with my family and friends.  Sorry for that, well, no, I’m not sorry for the post but I am sorry that you are upset.  All I’m going to say is that some of you have some pretty thin skin.

I’m guessing that you are not so much upset with me as by the fact that the subject matter caused you to confront a subject you would rather leave buried somewhere.  Not my fault.  I’m just sharing what I have been thinking about recently.

There will be more posts in my private blog so as not to upset yo’all.  It helps me a lot to right down my thoughts and work out the issues I’m dealing with.

Be honest, you need to work out what you think about sin just as much as I do.  I need to know WHY I believe what I believe.  I need to know that what I believe is not JUST something I have been taught and thereby accepted as truth.  The Holy Scriptures have taken me much of the way but there is still a pathway to be followed.

Stay tuned…

Why Does Sin Have Such a Pull On the Human Spirit?

Here is a question that I have been struggling with for some time:  Why does Sin have such a pull on the human spirit?  We know that there are consequences for sinning.  We know that it will not be pleasant when we have to fess up and pay the price for our sin.  We even understand that our sin affects more that just we ourselves, i.e., family and friends and possibly innocent bystanders. Yet, we are still drawn to sin much like a moth is to fire.

Each of us has experienced having been drawn to something we know will be harmful to us and those around us.  There are many things in each of our lives.  Perhaps it is gossip, or using an illegal substance, or the way we treat others, or what we allow our selves to watch, or perhaps, even it is a clandestine meet up that we know will only bring hurt and anger.  The list is endless.  You can add your sin or sins to the list if you like.

So, back to my question.  Why are we drawn to the thing we know will be unpleasant, harmful and in many cases downright disgusting?  We have not even talked about introducing the God Factor yet. I mean, if we leave God out of the problem (not a good thing to do under any circumstance) and just look at the physical affects of doing something that we know is going to result in pain, injury or even fractured relationship with those whom we love, why do we do it?  Why are we so drawn, so enamored?  Why is it not repulsive?  Why do we not instinctively turn and run away?

I do have a theory, and it is only a theory, that since we live in a society that does not believe in, nor practice, being held responsible for our actions, we dismiss the fact that there WILL be consequences and instead, shrug off the thought that it will hurt anyone but ourselves.  Therefore in our minds we lessen the consequence and minimize it effect or perhaps even try to rationalize our actions as not hurting anyone else so therefore it is OK. 

I am not a theologian, psychologist or theoretician and I have no experience here except for my own to draw from, but this type of thinking sounds like it will not end well.  I already know that it does not feel well and that having so many questions is confusing at best.  I want answers and not just theories or suggestions.  I also want to understand without doubts why I believe what I believe. 

So where do we go from here?  No, where do “I” go from here? 

My journey has now begun.

New Doctor

Well, the meet and greet is over.  I really like my new doctor.  He is young and energetic.  I like his outlook on life and most importantly, he made me feel comfortable.  Not comfortable enough for my blood pressure to lower much however. 

He is starting me on some new drugs and I have a lot of tests to do over the next few weeks.  Not so bad, I would have had to do the tests anyway.  I just hate (yes, that is the correct term) doing blood tests of any kind.  AND, I really don’t like fasting.  Having to do both at the same time is nothing short of torture. 

The Adventure Continues

So…the adventure continues…well, at least the health care adventure continues.  In December Kathleen and I made the decision to change insurance for me.  After about 12 years with Group Health I’m moving over to Premera.  GH was good to me…no complaints there.  But Obama Care made a mess of everything!

I meet with a new doctor today.  That will mean new labs, blood draws and probably new prescriptions.  I’m not totally sure how I feel about that unless they reduce the meds.  That I would be in favor of.  I will probably have most of it sorted out in a month or so.

It’s the Day Before Christmas–Why Am I So Sad?

It is the day before Christmas.  Why do I feel so sad, so depressed, do oppressed?  This should be a very happy time of year, yet, I feel overwhelmed with all that is going on in the world. 

I live in a relatively safe place.  Not much impacts my lifestyle and my day to day goings on other than the choices I make.  But there are many throughout the world for whom that is not the case.  They are oppressed and put down, some even threated with the ending of their lives by bullies and mad men. 

I’m beginning to  think it is all about control.  Control that is real or even perceived.  How do you combat that without armies at your disposal?  I want to beat the crap out of these power hungry morons.  Yet, I know that will not solve the problem.  It will only give me some fleeting sense of satisfaction that will last only for a short time.

What is my responsibility here?  I‘m guessing that this is the crux of my frustration, feelings of being overwhelmed and depression.  I really do not know WHAT my responsibility is. 

It is easy to ignore these issues for a time but they seem to come back again and again, never really leaving, just being hidden or covered up by other thoughts.  I’m hoping that by the time the new year comes I will be able to find some sort of answer.  I welcome your ideas.

Fear of the Puppy

We kept our two grandsons, ages 3 and 5, from Kansas City over night last night.  First time to stay with us without mom and dad.  Due to mom’s extreme allergies they have had very little access to puppies, cats and other live animals.

Just after mom and dad left for a night of alone time I opened the door to the garage and three medium sized dogs rushed by me to see who the new voices belonged to.  Immediately we had terrorized screaming from the other room.  I mean, climb the nearest lamp pole terror.  We had two very upset screaming kids looking for a place to hid from three dogs who wanted nothing less than to lick there faces.  Hands held high, stomachs sucked in, midriffs bare, extra high pitched voices, dancing and screaming along with flashing doggie tongues.  What a scene.

By bed time the boys were fighting to see who would get to sleep with which dog!  They hugged and petted them until the dogs were looking for places to hid.  Quite a change from just hours before. 

This morning both boys were looking for things in the kitchen that they could feed to the dogs.  I mean feed from their hands/fingers.  They thought it funny when they would get licked in the process.

Now, their challenge will be to get mom to cave in and allow a dog…not going to happen…EVER!

Help From Above

Father,

You are … well … you are High and Mighty … you are Loving and Caring … you are Honored and Worshiped.  You are … well … everything we are not.

I ask for your help in this mornings meeting.  It is not easy to go in and ask a customer for grace and compassion but that is exactly what we are preparing to do.  I ask that you would go ahead of us and prepare the way and that you would be beside us and hold us up – make us bold but not too bold – help us to be humble and yet stand for what is right and fair.

Father, we ask that you would go after us and protect us from sharp words and malicious oaths that might be directed at us.  Help us to represent you the best we can … and yet we implore you to act on our behalf.

We honor and adore you.  You are Great and our friend.