It’s the Day Before Christmas–Why Am I So Sad?

It is the day before Christmas.  Why do I feel so sad, so depressed, do oppressed?  This should be a very happy time of year, yet, I feel overwhelmed with all that is going on in the world. 

I live in a relatively safe place.  Not much impacts my lifestyle and my day to day goings on other than the choices I make.  But there are many throughout the world for whom that is not the case.  They are oppressed and put down, some even threated with the ending of their lives by bullies and mad men. 

I’m beginning to  think it is all about control.  Control that is real or even perceived.  How do you combat that without armies at your disposal?  I want to beat the crap out of these power hungry morons.  Yet, I know that will not solve the problem.  It will only give me some fleeting sense of satisfaction that will last only for a short time.

What is my responsibility here?  I‘m guessing that this is the crux of my frustration, feelings of being overwhelmed and depression.  I really do not know WHAT my responsibility is. 

It is easy to ignore these issues for a time but they seem to come back again and again, never really leaving, just being hidden or covered up by other thoughts.  I’m hoping that by the time the new year comes I will be able to find some sort of answer.  I welcome your ideas.

Fear of the Puppy

We kept our two grandsons, ages 3 and 5, from Kansas City over night last night.  First time to stay with us without mom and dad.  Due to mom’s extreme allergies they have had very little access to puppies, cats and other live animals.

Just after mom and dad left for a night of alone time I opened the door to the garage and three medium sized dogs rushed by me to see who the new voices belonged to.  Immediately we had terrorized screaming from the other room.  I mean, climb the nearest lamp pole terror.  We had two very upset screaming kids looking for a place to hid from three dogs who wanted nothing less than to lick there faces.  Hands held high, stomachs sucked in, midriffs bare, extra high pitched voices, dancing and screaming along with flashing doggie tongues.  What a scene.

By bed time the boys were fighting to see who would get to sleep with which dog!  They hugged and petted them until the dogs were looking for places to hid.  Quite a change from just hours before. 

This morning both boys were looking for things in the kitchen that they could feed to the dogs.  I mean feed from their hands/fingers.  They thought it funny when they would get licked in the process.

Now, their challenge will be to get mom to cave in and allow a dog…not going to happen…EVER!

Help From Above

Father,

You are … well … you are High and Mighty … you are Loving and Caring … you are Honored and Worshiped.  You are … well … everything we are not.

I ask for your help in this mornings meeting.  It is not easy to go in and ask a customer for grace and compassion but that is exactly what we are preparing to do.  I ask that you would go ahead of us and prepare the way and that you would be beside us and hold us up – make us bold but not too bold – help us to be humble and yet stand for what is right and fair.

Father, we ask that you would go after us and protect us from sharp words and malicious oaths that might be directed at us.  Help us to represent you the best we can … and yet we implore you to act on our behalf.

We honor and adore you.  You are Great and our friend.

Am I Focusing on the Right Things?

Wow.  It is so easy to focus on things that should not matter and forget to focus on the things that do.  Setting priorities seems to be more difficult every day.

Does it really matter that I check my phone every hour for missed calls or text messages?  Does it matter that I check the litany of news sites for the latest news?  Is it really news I’m interested in or just gossip.

I mean, what really is important and what do I need to be focusing on?  Work ranks up towards the top – especially when I am at work.  Family should be up there too – but ???  What should I be focused on?  And, where does God fit in my day?

Most of my waking hours each week are spent at work or traveling to and from work.  What do I focus on for those hours?  What should I focus on during those hours?  My boss has one idea, I have an idea.  Who’s is right?

This is the conclusion I have come to:  focus on God for the commute to and from work.  My commute is about an hour and 15 minutes one way.  That gives me over 2-1/2 hours a day to focus on Him and what He wants in my life.  Much of that time is spent in quiet reflection and listening for His voice to speak to me.  It really helps to set my day both at work and in my home life.

Work means focusing on work.  There is no other way to say it.  I need to focus on my work responsibilities, employees and what the company needs from me.

Home is where I am able to focus on family.  My poor wife!  She gets what is left of my day and attention.  Usually it is not much.  Perhaps more grumbling and short conversations than hugs and kisses.   She likes to be hugged and told sweet things and I want to escape to some alone time, some fly tying or even some mind numbing TV.  She gets left out of my day pretty regularly.

I do like to spend my weekends focusing on family even when I would like to be alone, well, alone with her.  Just the two of us.  That happens perhaps one out of five weekends.  Not nearly often enough.

AND, I am able to focus on God on Sunday mornings as we attend church.  I love those times with Him.  But is that enough?  I think I know the answer and I’m not sure what to do about it.

Rough Week

Well, its been a rough week.  We just finished a very large job for a national customer.  It did not go as well as we had hoped.  We did finish…on time…and the customer is quite satisfied with our work.  They are even satisfied with our bill.  You see, we billed them what we had agreed to before we started work even though our costs far exceeded that amount.

This was a big project for us.  Almost a quarter of our yearly receipts in less than two months.  Loosing money on projects is never easy but as the numbers get bigger and have more zeros behind the decimal point the losses are all the more painful.

I have always said that I would rather loose money on a small job than on  a big one.  This is why.  However, with all this said, the Lord is blessing us.  I must remember to say thank you to Jesus.  Thank you Jesus for all you do for us.